Thursday, 07 July 2011

  • People don't know how hard it was to get to where we are now. My relationship with you was a little more private then my other relationships. I have really came to enjoy that. Our ups and down were between us,what went wrong we fixed together. There were times when certain people did know our problems,and they interfered,but it was you and me who fought through everything and fixed everything. 1 year 7 months 2 weeks 6 days later from the FIRST day we ever meet, you finally asked me to become your girlfriend. Boy was I happy. Finally everything I held onto paid off. It amazes me how we fell in love with each other. Since the first day I meet you, till this day we have only seen each other less then 20 times. How did we fall in love like this? Through our understanding of each other. We knew our relationship was hard to begin with,we barley saw each other,but we survived. And every time we saw each other we fell deeper in love each time. I never thought I would end up with you,I never thought I would be with you. I never thought we would even be friends,but I thought all wrong. I love you,and I know you love me too. 

    NO GUY would chase me down the street while i'm sprinting my ass off. No guy would put up with my psycho mood swings,and not leave. No guy would stay when I tell him to leave every night. No guy would fight with me EVERY single night and still tell me I love you before we go to sleep. No guy can compare to the way I know you love me and the way I know I love you too.

Monday, 06 June 2011

  • Cheesecake and Cupcakes.

    Your favorite dessert is cheesecake. "What's my favorite dessert?" Cupcakes from that one place you and your mom always go to. "What's my favorite flavor?" I don't know. Red Velvet and Strawberry. "What's my favorite chocolate?" I don't know. "It's something you think is nasty.I like dark chocolate."UGH,that shit is nasty. Aha,told you,now you know my favorite dessert and favorite chocolate. You know what? People talk about this at the beginning of their relationship not a a year later. What have we been talking about for the past year and a half?" Nonsense. ;)

    He likes cheesecakes and I like cupcakes. I like dark chocolate and he thinks its nasty. A year and a half later,and this is what we learned barley last night. Because for the past year we have been talking nonsense to each other,and now we're finally getting to know each other. ;)

     

     

Sunday, 01 May 2011

Saturday, 30 April 2011

  • I recently realized that even though we haven't been talking for very long this guy means a lot to me. We have been talking for only 1 year and 5 months. I'm a totally bitch to him most of the time,I push him away so much. I'm so scared that he's going to leave me,but he's still here. I realize that if he didn't care for me he wouldn't be here still. He wouldn't put up with all my crazy mood swings,he wouldn't put up with me. I love him for being him,and I love him for still being here for me each and everyday. I hope he can remain in my life for a really long time. I love him so much,and sometimes I hate myself for loving him and caring for him to much,and that's when the bitch comes out in me. I hate myself for that sometimes,but I can't fight what I feel,and I can't stop my feelings from evolving. We love each other we hate each other,and we fight almost everyday,but at the end of the day we still love each other. No matter what happens between us throughout the day the last voice we hear each night is each others voices. I really love this guy. The one thing I would change about our relationship is..that we don't see each other a lot. If i'm lucky i'll see him once or twice a month. There was a time when we went 6 months without seeing each other,and that time should have showed me how much we really meant to each other. Six months without seeing someone and the feelings are still there. It's unbelievable,our love is unbelievable. He's unbelievable.<3 

    Its the first time in my life, I can actually picture myself years from now still wanting to be with someone. Sometimes it kills me knowing the future is just a 50/50 chance. I still want him in my life years from now,and hopefully grow old with him,but i'm a realist, I know there's a chance that won't happen. It's still nice to tell him what I want in my future,and have him actually listen to me. I really love him. 

    The thing with me is when I love someone I push them away,I need to stop if I want him to remain in my life for a really long time.

     

Sunday, 13 March 2011

  • "You keep running away from all the fears that you can’t hide, and through the pain you feel inside and the tears you’ve cried tonight. Cause you gotta breathe it in, when you feel so alone, you gotta breathe again, until the pain is gone."